Moments of Grace

Originally published in October 2011.

As many grieving people know, keeping a loved one’s memory alive after they die can be a difficult task. There are many images, voices, smells and memories that you want to remember forever, but each day it can become a little bit harder to grasp on to what used to be. I have definitely been struggling with this ever since my mom passed away two years ago this December.

Since my mother’s death was unexpected, I have often worried about feeling disconnected to her or become scared that I’m going to start forgetting the little things about her. Thankfully I have found comfort in small “moments of grace” that reassure me that my mom is still with me throughout each day. These moments have been occurring within my family’s life through the appearance of deer and ladybugs.

Female deer symbolize caring, gentleness, intelligence, watchfulness, and most importantly to me, maternal traits.  Some cultures believe that anyone who sees a deer has seen the animal so that they can look deep into their own heart and find their deepest treasure.  When I was growing up, our yard always attracted deer. They would come to eat my mom’s Hosta plants even after she would try vigorously to cover them and make them seem less appetizing. So when deer started appearing more frequently after my mom died, my family saw it as a comical sign.

The day after she passed away, my aunt and I were in the foyer of my house. As we opened my front door there were six deer standing there, looking in. We knew right away that it had to be a sign from Mom. We felt that she was trying to tell us that even though she was gone, there would always be six people in our family.

The deer made another appearance when I woke up on the morning of what would have been my mom’s 50th birthday and heard our golden retriever barking loudly. When I looked out our side window, I saw four deer in the front yard. I turned to my dad and said, “You know this is a sign right?” He stood there as his eyes welled up, and he responded, “She must have wanted to make sure we were all up in time for mass.” That morning there were four deer, one for each family member that was in the house at the time. Since her death, my family and I have seen many deer, in some very unique places and times. I love seeing them because they remind me that my mother is always watching over us.

It is not only in one of God’s largest animals that I see my mom, but also in one of His smallest creatures. On Christmas Eve, about a week after my mom’s death, my friend Katy was in our church for midnight mass. After lighting a candle in memory of my mom, she felt something small touch her on the face. She thought it was a fly, but her mom told her it was a ladybug. Katy tells me that she knew it had to be a sign. In her head she said, “If it really is you, Mrs. Wilson, please fly by again.” Two seconds later, it did. Because it was in the middle of winter she thought that it was quite an odd and unusual coincidence. But she sincerely felt that the ladybug held a message for us, and afterwards shared her story with my family.

Since then, we have been seeing ladybugs everywhere. No matter the weather, I can find ladybugs sitting on the porch of my townhouse or gathering in the back room of a restaurant. On what would have been my parent’s 20th wedding anniversary, my family and I went to New Hampshire for a vacation. Upon walking into the hotel I noticed a ladybug cartoon on the bulletin board in the lobby. I was also graced with the presence of a ladybug when I was in Jamaica this past January for a service immersion trip. I was having an emotionally draining day working with burn victim children at a local children’s hospital. I was standing in the playground watching the kids play on the swings when I felt something on my hand. When I looked down I saw a ladybug crawling up my arm. I sat there taking in the moment of grace as I watched its short legs move underneath it. Even in another country, my mom knew just how to brighten my day.

After researching this little bug I learned that the name “lady bug” finds its origins in the Middle Ages. The insect was dedicated to the Virgin Mary and called the “beetle of our lady.”  This name links the ladybug to spiritual ideals and religious devotion. It also holds a link to mothers. Because the life cycle of the adult ladybug is short it teaches us how to release worries and enjoy our lives to the fullest. It is often seen as a messenger of promise telling us that we need to release our fears and return to love.

For a grieving family, moments of grace can be the difference between a rainy day or a sunny one. I realize that seeing the deer and ladybugs is difficult because they are constant reminders that my mom is gone, but they also reassure my family that she is with us.

I challenge today’s readers to think about their loved ones and try to recognize ways in which they could be sending you messages: yesterday, today or tomorrow. Finding ways to connect with a loved one even after they passed can be challenging at first, but it can also bring comfort in difficult times. What ways have you found to stay connected?

Special thanks to guest author and HelloGrief community member Colleen Wilson for sharing this piece with us.

58 Comments:

  1. Janice Goodger said on October 5, 2011 at 12:31 pm ... #

    My dearest friend, Barbara who died from breast cancer loved giraffes. You don’t see them very often, except at the zoo. But, whenever I go into a store and all of a sudden there is a toy giraffe or picture of a giraffe staring back at me, I know she is near by. Gives me great comfort.

  2. Barbara said on October 5, 2011 at 3:07 pm ... #

    My godmother passed away about 16 years ago in October. There was a butterfly that kept flying around her house after she passed. I went to college in downtown Boston at the time. She did not like this at all. She thought it was too dangerous and the day before she died yelled at my mother for “letting” me go there :P The memory makes me laugh. During Thanksgiving week, a Monarch butterfly was flying across Huntington Avenue in Boston. I feel like she was checking up on me. Sometimes they are around us and we know it and sometimes they are just watching out for us.

  3. Molly Eiche said on October 5, 2011 at 8:54 pm ... #

    Thank you so much for this beautiful article…When I read it I broke down in tears. I have not cried in a really long time and it was a very good release.
    It really touched my heart because I don’t think very many people talk about how our loved ones try and send us signs and messages after they have passed.
    My Grandma comes to me in Ladybugs too. I felt as though she was giving me a sign as I read your article and she knew I needed to hear the wonderful words you wrote. Thank you again..

    Thank you again,
    Molly Eiche
    Bare Heart Buddy, Founder
    meiche@bhbuddy.com
    http://www.bareheartbuddy.com

  4. Wanda Szarek said on October 6, 2011 at 9:43 am ... #

    You are my daily inspiration.

  5. ellen said on October 6, 2011 at 10:08 am ... #

    Yah Colleen! Congratulations on having your article published. I Just went with your sister to a college fair and like so many times I was thinking how much your mom would want to be doing this. As I was preoccupied with these thoughts I saw two different sightings of deers standing on the side of the road on my way there. Fallon saw her own on the way home, and there was one waiting in the yard when she pulled in. So, as much as your moms death has rocked our worlds, I firmly believe that there are no coincidences, she is here always and these simple reminders make me smile!

  6. Taisha said on October 6, 2011 at 12:13 pm ... #

    I’ve had the same experience with my brother who passed in April through butterflies. At his memorial, we did a butterfly release ceremony. Thereafter, we’ve seen butterflies all around us. I even see them as print on people’s clothing, as jewelry ornaments and etc. Thank you for such an inspirational story! All the best!

  7. Sarah said on October 7, 2011 at 11:15 pm ... #

    Beautiful article an expression! Your words convey what many who lose a loved one struggles and also smiles about. Sending love to you and your family!

  8. Katy said on October 8, 2011 at 10:56 am ... #

    Colleen, this article truly touched my heart and brought me to tears. I am so grateful to have had your mom in my life and you have in so many ways showed me that she will always be with us-especially through your strength, which reminds me so much of your mom. Thank you for sharing this article with me it is so beautiful and something I will add to my collection of ladybug things!

  9. Maura Benoit said on October 9, 2011 at 10:29 pm ... #

    Dear Colleen, You write as you speak – from the heart. That’s what draws so many people to you. You truly are a woman of wisdom and grace!Just as your mom was an inspiration for me, so now are you.

  10. Mary said on October 17, 2011 at 1:37 pm ... #

    What a wonderful way to remember your mother. Two weeks before my daughter passed away, she had just left our house to go to her home and she came running back to tell me there was a double rainbow! She was so excited. We both took pictures and were smiling at the beauty God was sharing with us that evening. Four days after her death, I was crying at the laundromat we would go to every week, and a woman asked me if I had seen the beautiful rainbow outside. I knew that at moment that my daughter was sending me a hug with that single rainbow.

  11. Pamela said on November 16, 2011 at 8:49 pm ... #

    Dear Colleen,
    I’m so glad that you shared this. You are a beautiful writer; I have been very inspired and impressed with how strong you have been during the past couple years. My older sister recently got married and on that day of the wedding I was reminded of how fortunate I am that both of my parents are alive and well. My heart goes out to you and others that I know who have lost one or both parents. I hope that you continue to remain positive and strong through everything.
    You Are Loved,
    Pamela English

  12. Angie said on January 2, 2012 at 1:05 am ... #

    My boyfriend just suddenly passed away in his sleep on our couch.. I never had a chance to say “Goodbye”. But the day of his funeral I was home alone at nite, & there was a knock on my door & when I went to open the door, there was no one there..I know it was him checking on me to make sure I was doing ok…
    There have also been other signs that I feel his presence & smell his cologne, I believe he is still around…
    I always feel peace when I get these feelings <3

  13. Jonathan said on February 27, 2012 at 12:16 am ... #

    When my life was going through some changes I felt like your parents were always looking out for me. Sometimes when I see ladybugs I think of your mom and it tells me that I know that I’m doing the right thing. She took me in when I had nowhere to go and I think that even now she is helping me find my way in an often confusing world.

    Love you Colleen.

  14. Kay said on March 4, 2012 at 12:19 am ... #

    My husband died 14-years-ago. He was in good health and his death was so unexpected. He suffered a ruptured aortic aneurysm. Anyway, we were struggling to make ends meet, and I asked him to just pawn my diamond. I told him it would be okay that I would get the ring out soon. Well, he died and I did not get the ring back. To make a long story short….I kept finding little diamond looking baubles around the house. One in the bathroom, one in the living room, and one in a hotel room (on business)….of all places! Well, I put them on my dresser and kept wondering where they came from. I looked at my purses, shoes, clothes, everything to see what these were falling off of. I had nothing….no explanation. Then one day, it hit me like a ton of bricks. My late husband was giving me back my diamond in his own way. I cried and cried at this realization. When I went to look at them again…they were gone. I am the only one who lives here, and no one else was in my bedroom. So, I wondered why all of them disappeared. Anyway, a few months pass….and guess what? I found another one on the living room rug. I now know why these appear as they do. It is a sign from him. He is still with me, and is watching over me. I thanked him and told him I am doing okay. I have now put this new bauble in a zip lock bag. I want to keep it as long as I can. If this one disappears, I guess I will chalk it up to the fact that things that come from the other side cannot stay here permanently. I find so much comfort in these little signs from him. So, just accept these gifts and know that your loved ones still watch over you.

  15. Colleen said on March 8, 2012 at 12:40 pm ... #

    Kay,

    Thank you for your openness and your story. I really appreciate it and love that you are finding comfort in your husband’s diamonds. Absolutely beautiful.

    Colleen Wilson

  16. Carrie Pearl said on April 17, 2012 at 3:14 pm ... #

    My daughters grandmother passed away on March 22, 2012 (my ex-mother inlaw) my daughter is 21 she was very close to her grandmother and had never lost a loved one before. I’ve always stayed in touch with my ex inlaws and I was unable to make it to her services as I was in hospitalized from major surgery. I was sitting here with my daughter today and she had a question for me asking what they did with her grandmothers personal belonings from the service one thing being a Cardinal blanket, she loved red cradinals. She had little statues of them along with christmas tree decorations of them and many sweatshirts and blankets that had pictures of the red cardinals. I told her that they would leave that with her after the services are over. This afternoon I came home from running an errand as I pulled into my parking spot I could hear this bird just chirping away I didnt pay much attention to it when I got out of my car it was still chirping at that point I looked up and on a tree branch infront of where we live was this big red cardinal. I couldn’t believe it we have lived here for over 5 years and I’ve never seen one all. I put my purse on the hood of my car and took out my cell phone to take a picture, I was able to get close enough to take two pictures of this beautiful bird before it was scared off by neighboring kids who were yelling and running around. I immidately forwarded my daughter a picture of the bird, her reply was we have never had one of these around here before. I truly believe it was a sign from her grandmother who truly loved these birds. I have goosebumps as I type this. I’ve heard of people having little signs like this happen and I never doubted them, but to have it happen to me was truly amazing and being able to share the picture with my daughter was even more amazing. I hope she felt some comfort from this and I’m sure she will be looking again for herself. I just had an urge that I needed to share this story with you. It will be 4 weeks this Thursday that her grandmother passed.

  17. Loving Dove said on April 18, 2012 at 1:28 pm ... #

    A few days before my grandfather passed, I whispered in his ear that I hoped he’d come back to me as a bird. He’d been so sick for so long and the once military man who spent years tilling his own farmland could no longer walk. A bird, I told him, could travel anywhere in the world on his own time. He could go back and visit all the farmland he’d left behind when he became ill, and he can follow me wherever I traveled.

    When I received a call that he was dying, my husband picked me up from work. As I slid into the passenger seat, a bluebird settled at eye level atop the car. In the middle of a bustling city, this small bird remained perched just long enough to skip along closer to me before flying away. I knew there wasn’t much time left. My grandfather passed a few moments after I arrived at his bedside and kissed him goodbye.

    I wear a Dove necklace and find myself fiddling with it whenever I need a little extra support. Doves are well known as symbols of love, peace or as messengers. Well, I’m lucky to have my own little messenger and amazing connection to “my buddy.” And we are all lucky to have Comfort Zone Camp.

    Thank you for sharing, Colleen.

  18. Terri said on May 7, 2012 at 9:04 pm ... #

    My father passed away on August 15, 2009 from prostate cancer. He didn’t tell a soul until he was unable to care for himself. I made him travel with my mother to my home in Georgia so I could do just that. They arrives on July 8th and by August 15th he was gone. I was devastated…taking care of a person you love so dearly takes a horrible toll on you. Plus, the fact that we didn’t have a relationship until I was 21 did not help the situation. I felt cheated and was left to wonder why things happened the way they did. The very next day after his cremation, I was sitting in my backyard and I was suddenly surrounded by about 10 black, large butterflies. They just flew all around me. I immediately started crying because that has NEVER happened to
    me before….I KNEW it was my father visiting me…comforting me. It’s been almost three years since his passing, and butterflies still visit me regularly. It brings me some peace because I miss him so much. My husband bought me a lovely butterfly pendant that I wear in remembrance of him. This butterfly thing…it’s the truth and I thank God that departed loved ones can visit us this way.

  19. Shelly said on May 12, 2012 at 10:51 am ... #

    A little over a month ago I went to visit my Grandma in the hospital. As I was leaving she tells me, “I love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.” I replied with a laugh “I love you too and all that other stuff too.”
    My Grandma passed last week and as I was sitting in my bathroom struggling to get ready for her visitation my 4 year old daughter comes home from Sunday school and tells me she has something for me. She hands me a note that read “I love you a bushel and a peck a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.”

    Thank you for sharing your story, and for letting me share mine.
    Shelly

  20. Patsey Herrera said on May 16, 2012 at 9:25 pm ... #

    My son Jonathan wrote this in his letter today: I can’t believe it’s almost a year now. I still remember the day, my heart was hurting that morning about 9:30 a.m. Sharp pain for at least an hour, I kept rubbing it, of course; being a guy, I said I’ll wait it out. I just prayed. Later that evening, about 6:30 p.m., before the sun went all the way down, two deer came. First the Daddy, he walk slowly right by the fence, not even scared, he slowly walk ahead, next was the younger deer, he was not scared either, he stopped, just stood there and looked right at me, then they both calmly walked away. I thought to myself, SOMETHING has happened, I knew SOMEONE had left us. Now I look back and I think how AMAZING!! I know my Cheii (Grandpa) said Goodbye in a beautiful way…Later, when I called my son Jonathan to let him know that we had lost his beloved Cheii, my son told me, “I know Mom, Cheii came to say Goodbye to me, he came with my Dad.” See, my son’s Dad had passed away when my son was a little boy, so Cheii was ‘everything’…My other teenage son, Antonio was the one who found Cheii hours after Cheii had passed. Antonio was very close to Cheii also. With prayers, Antonio has become stronger again. As a family we are healing. Two months after my Dad passed, Antonio and I were at my Dad’s house, I was in the living room and all of a sudden, ALL the hair on my arms stood straight up, I had goosebumps galore, I knew I was in Dad’s aura. I wasn’t afraid. I spoke to Dad right then and there. My Dad gave me comfort. Thank you for allowing me to share my story, and for also sharing your story. It is beautiful.

  21. Randi said on May 19, 2012 at 10:20 am ... #

    My Beautiful Mom passed away from colon cancer 2 years ago today. She was 52 ..my Best friend and encouragement all my life. We found out she had colon cancer and 4 months later she passed away. My Mom has always believed in signs and I knew she would send us them. She always said my Papa Em came through yellow butterflies. Now, I know my Mom has come to me and my family through butterflies and many other ways, I am on the 2 nd journal of signs from my Mom. I really want to write a book because it is amazing the signs my family has gotten. Some months ago one of my brothers told my family of a sign from her. My brother had gone to take a bath and thrown his towel over the towel bar and he was praying to my mom and crying and he said something made him look at where he threw his towel. he looked and saw that the towel had somehow made it look like my moms hair was up in it and on the wall was the outlining of her face. he took a picture of this and it is simply amazing. Another sign: On Christmas morning I was in my bedroom and Til this day I still text my Mom even though an error message bounces back I still do..so I was in my room and I sent a text telling her Merry Christmas Love and miss you so much Momma..right when I pressed send My moms lamp in my bedroom turned off. I knew it was a sign. On November 5 th 2011 my youngest brother got married, That night I went sleep at my Auntie’s house, Her and my Sweet Mom were very close and I feel like my Mom is with us when I’m with her. I decided to sleep there that night. We stayed up talking about my Mom and signs and so on. I believe it was that morning I had seen my Auntie get up and she wears a robe like my mom. I remember being have asleep and I felt the embrace of a hug and it’s like I felt like I felt this person was wearing a robe and it was my Auntie. I finally told my Auntie about this and after I had left she called my cousin ( her daughter) because after telling her this she was amazed. She didn’t actually hug me but even though I was half asleep I really felt the tight squeeze of a hug. My Auntie told my cousin and me later that all night the night before she felt like she needed to just hug me but she didn’t want me to think she was strange. We both believe My Sweet Mom hugged me for her. I have so many other signs and with butterflies. I thank God for letting my Momma send Me and My Family signs because without them I would feel so empty. My Mom had the strongest faith in God and I knew she would be with us spiritually. Embrace the signs because they are there :)

  22. Susan Beaver said on May 27, 2012 at 10:12 pm ... #

    I lost my mother about two years ago and have had experiences with butteries. Soon after my mother passed I visited her at her grave site. I placed a little angel on her grave and began to pray and cry to God that she was ok. When I look up a gold and brown butterfly landed on the angels wing. Somehow I thought that was her way of saying that she was ok. About a week later I went back to her grave site and wrote “I love you” in the dirt and then began to cry and pray and when I looked up the same color butterfly was sitting on the words “I love you”. It really made me think. The most recent event was a few weeks ago. I had been praying to god to please give me peace with my mom’s death and let me know that she is ok. Well, I was on my porch with my family and a brown and gold butterfly was flying around. I told my family what I had been praying about and then I said “butterfly if my mom is ok please land in my hand” right after I said that the butterfly landed in my hand. I thought this mush be a coincidence. So, I held out me hand and said “butterfuly if my mom is ok please land in my hand” and it did. It continued to do this aleast 7 different times. Then two of my daughters, grandson and grad daughter also wanted the butterfly to land in their hand. So, I said “butterly this is Betty’s grand daughter please land in her hand and it did. I continue the same statement with my other daughter, my grandson and my grad daughter and the butterfly landed in their hand. Not sure, if this was a coincidence but I have neaver been around any butterflys that land on command. It is my hope that this is a sign from my mother that she is ok. I will forever cheerish my mom’s memory and pray that I see many more butterflys.

  23. Molly said on July 25, 2012 at 10:17 am ... #

    My Dad was a passenger in a car that was T-boned as it pulled into a driveway. Sadly, at 42 years old, he was gone. I was 16 at the time, and had an 11 and 7 year old brother to help my Mom look after. It was hard for us, the boys especially missed our Dad and struggled hard to cope with the loss. Over the years, we found clues that he was somehow making his presence known, that he was near. He loved Pabst Blue Ribbon beer, it was his favorite. On hot summer days, he would pop a top on a cold PBR and enjoy the day in the mountains where we live. It’s been 18 years since his passing and occasionally we STILL find PBR beer tops lying around the yard, always face up. Despite totally excavating the property and building a new home, we still found another top this summer, not even fully imbedded in the ground and turned so the PBR logo is visible. How can this be? In all, we’ve found 100+ beer tops despite the fact we hadn’t lived at that address for very long before his death. I chalk it up to him letting us know he is still with us and that a Father’s love is eternal and goes on long after living has ended.

  24. Patti said on August 9, 2012 at 8:36 pm ... #

    My sister just passed Aug 7/12 from ovarian cancer, since that day I have seen 3 ladybugs, as a matter of fact one is in my house now as I write this. I know for a fact it’s my sister.

  25. Veronica “Vee” for Barry said on September 21, 2012 at 11:45 pm ... #

    My beloved boyfriend, companion and best friend passed away 5 months ago, in his sleep, due to a heart condition…(he needed a pace maker). It has been so painful for me to imagine going on without him. I today was feeling so so sad, alone and missing him terribly so. I was driving to work with an elderly man I help 3x week. I was in suburb and out of no where, 3 beautiful deer leaped in front of my car–seemed as if in slow motion…they leaped so elegantly across the street. I pass this way 6x week for the last 4 years, and before that–and there has never been deer in the subdivision! I felt it was a sign from Barry telling me he is okay..and that I was not alone.
    I then came home and googled the symbolims of deer/3 deer, and found this scripture: Isaiah 35:6 “The Lame shall leap as deer in the Kingdom of God”.
    Barry was born with a heart condition and had trouble with his joints, he worked tirelessly for others as a college professor, friend, father figure and more. He never complained.!

    I also saw an American Robin in the tree outside my window another day when feeling just as sad. I heard from a Native American lady that when someone we love passes, that animal sightings will come to comfort us. I truly accept this as a sign…
    I love him so much it hurts my heart so much it’s as if someone is wringing out my heart…
    blessings and comfort to you all
    Vee/colorado

  26. Veronica “Vee” for Barry said on September 21, 2012 at 11:54 pm ... #

    I also read that DEER are a symbol to the Native Americans as

    “Symbol of Gentleness, Unconditional Love and Kindness”

    My Barry was gentle, very gentle and very loving and supportive no matter what..and kind. And generous too.

    The deer today reminded me of my DEAR that I love still. I have learned that LOVE DOES NOT DIE! our love lives on, and that comforts me…he still loves me too. God is love. The Bible says that “love never ends”–and “endures all things” and that is beautiful to know that when I pass one day, my children will know that i still love them and they, me.

    Hugs
    Prayers
    and gentle deer

  27. Mari said on October 10, 2012 at 3:59 pm ... #

    I stumbled across your blog and felt a rush of emotion when I read about the deer. My husband died 3 months ago from a boating accident. The morning after he passed I was unable to sleep and was up around 5am and went to sit outside on the patio curled up in one of his favorite flannel shirts. I saw 2 deer just grazing in the neighbors yard. I actually saw them put there heads up and look my way. I talked to them and called them by my husband and his brothers name as I was sure thats why they were there. How comforting to know the symbolism behind this beautiful creature of God! I know he is still with me and also believe that “love never ends”

  28. James Buchanan said on October 14, 2012 at 12:04 am ... #

    My father passed away unexpectedly August 25th of 2011 and I see signs of him every day. I have three sisters and my wonderful mother to talk to but I am the only boy. I was lucky enough to tell my father I am gay a couple years before his passing because it changed the dynamic of our relationship for the better.
    I recenly talked to my sister who confessed to me she hears her new wood floor pop as if it were being walked on and my father had his own construction business for 30 years so she feels that is her sign of his presence. I have always had a very open mind and I see signs everywhere I go but they are not random. I got in my car to leave work today with him heavily on my mind and one of his favorite songs started(not a commonly played song) as the song ended i surfed stations and heard a random station say “daddy” as i skipped not thinking anything and the next station i landed on said WIN tickets….well my father is named Winfield and he was called Win by all. It feels great to have read everyone’s stories and know I am not alone in my belief that signs are assurance that our loved ones are always with us. Everyone has a choice to believe what they want but I know in my heart that despite the variety of signs different people receive there designed to catch our atttention….thank you for letting me share

  29. lloyd said on October 26, 2012 at 1:42 pm ... #

    Colleen, thank you so much for sharing this link in your reflection. I loved reading about the signs – you write so beautifully and from all the comments you clearly touched a lot of people with your message.

  30. Helen Daruszka said on November 11, 2012 at 9:14 pm ... #

    My husband, Leo passed away Feb 20, 2012 – He had been working on a butterfly garden and bought special plants for it and books to tell him what to do etc and when I go outside I say honey look a butterfly. There are lots of little things that happen to keep his memory with me when I hear our favorite songs or remember something that made us laugh I just smile and close my eyes and talk to him – he comforts me. God has helped me thought it all and I thank God everyday for giving me the time I had with my husband, my best friend.

  31. Renee said on November 14, 2012 at 12:16 pm ... #

    It is November and I am seeing lady bugs at my house and today I just saw one on my desk at work. I felt right away that there was a bigger meaning behind seeing them. Thank you for sharing your story!

  32. catherine said on December 6, 2012 at 9:30 am ... #

    After my dad died I sat outside looking at the sky thinking “Why did you take my best friend away from me and why do you keep giving me grief” I live in Wisconsin and Its cold right now and there were no animals to be seen. All of a sudden a cute baby bird pops out of the bushes and a woodpecker flys right in front of me, two squirrels pop out of nowhere and 10 geese fly above my head. Ever since then I felt like he was there. I went to my mother in laws house and told her the story and a bluejay appeared and stayed there the entire time, it was his favorite bird. Since 3 weeks ago I see bluejays, woodpeckers and tons of birds in the cold month of December.

  33. Tara said on January 3, 2013 at 9:56 am ... #

    It was Thanksgiving and my whole family was there except my Dad who died 6 years ago. His younger brother was outside in the yard when he called to all of us to come. There in the middle of the yard was a beautiful Buck. We all grabbed our cameras and walked carefully out onto the deck to take a photograph. The deer moved closer to us! All the grandchildren gathered on the steps. I walked to the bottom of the steps and the deer slowly walked toward me. Never Never has this ever happened in my life. All my experiences with deer were their fear and running away. We brought handfuls of dry oatmeal to the bottom of the steps. The deer came right up and ate. Looking in each of our eyes. So gentle and reassuring. I knew that this must be my Dad. Could this be possible??? Eventually the deer walked gracefully back into the woods. If it was my Dad what was he trying to tell us? I miss him so much.

  34. Renee said on March 10, 2013 at 6:26 pm ... #

    My husband passed away December 21, 2012 after he collapsed unexpectedly of a stroke 2 days before. I used to get on him about leaving change all over the house. Now every so often I find change in the most oddest places. It is comforting to know he’s still leaving it around for me.

  35. hanna said on April 14, 2013 at 2:50 am ... #

    my grandpa passed away when I was 17 and in boarding school 9 hrs away from where my family was in NY. There were ladybugs everywhere in my dorm room and on window sills, everywhere i went for a month! when i told my mom about this she said that where she was there were also ladybugs everywhere she and her brother went. it was definitley my grandpa. and now 7 yrs later my son just turned a year old and he is named after my grandpa and on his birthday there were ladybugs everywhere!! grandpa came to visit my son. boy i miss him

  36. joe said on April 20, 2013 at 9:06 pm ... #

    My beloved soulmate of 35 years passed on Mar 5 2012. There have been many signs of her presence. The one ill share happened on my son birthday Feb 12 2013. We always set a place for her at the table, but we dont put any food on the plate. So we sang happy birthday and he blew out the candles. My son cut a piece of cake and put it on her plate. As he did it, the bedroom light turned off. I told my son thats your mother wishing you a happy birthday.

  37. Kari said on May 8, 2013 at 2:49 am ... #

    My great grandmother passed away just over two years ago. She and her husband had been in a nursing home for awhile. So my aunt and grandmother decided to rent their house out. I ride past the house sometimes and I always see a chair sitting under the carport. Tonight, I dreamt of my great grandma sitting in the chair she always used to when I would go to her house as a child. She looked absolutely beautiful. She always has. I looked up what this dream could mean. A chair in a dream indicates that you need to take a break and think about everything going on in your life. Just relax. The strange thing is, today was one of the worst days at school I’ve had in a while. I feel certain she is with me now, tonight, and every night.

  38. jeffrey said on May 17, 2013 at 5:38 pm ... #

    i am so sorry

  39. Anonymous said on May 31, 2013 at 6:08 pm ... #

    My mom died this may 9 and I have been seeing this bird fly around where ever I am and I said to my husband look at that bird and he made the comment its just a bird but at her funeral graveside The same type bird was fling only bird in sight and 1200 miles from home and my sister commented look at that bird and I was researching and found you…Thanks so much!

  40. Maria said on July 9, 2013 at 12:55 pm ... #

    My husband died on July 1st, 2013 from a rare form of cancer. My whole world has fallen apart. We were a team and soul mates for over 25 years. I asked him to bring me a sign that he is ok. Today I set our I pad on the table and suddenly the screen turned beautiful shades of pink and blue and a song started up. It was Johnny Cash singing the words I am ok and I have jumped from the devils train, Gabriel come blow your horn I am ok. I think the songs title is the Gambler? The song played three times then stopped. I looked everywhere in the I pad for the song that I thought he had put in I tunes. There are no Johnny Cash songs anywhere. He wanted me to know he is ok but I still miss him and there is just a hole in my heart!! I am hoping he will continue to show me signs

  41. Philip Long said on July 13, 2013 at 10:30 pm ... #

    I had never heard any mention of Butterflies and death until a few hours ago after having a very strange but now comforting experience. Yesterday morning i was laying restless in bed and my girlfriend suddenly sat up in bed and started poking me in the eye, she was in a semi lucid state and told me that their was a Butterfly on my face. A couple of moments later my phone began ringing, i answered it and my Mum passed on the sad news that my Father had passed away. Later in the day i spoke to a friend and in passing mentioned the strange incident, he immediately told me that it was lovely and was a sign from my dad to let me know he had passed over. I have been home for an hour or so and decided to do an internet search of butterflies and death and was amazed by the amount of similar experiences people have kindly shared. My girlfriend said the butterfly was Green and White and appeared to be very real hence her poking me in the eye. Dad was 68 and die of cancer.

  42. Andrew said on August 4, 2013 at 12:58 am ... #

    I have something similar happen from time to time. I’m out of state, away from all of my family, attending college and studying nursing. My grandmother passed away in 2009, from Parkinson’s.

    She too was in the medical field as a medical transcriptionist for over thirty years. She saw that I had an interest in medicine and taught me a lot.

    Since I’ve been in school, I’ve struggled but thank God, I’m doing well. There have been times when I’m at school and I smell this perfume that my grandmother used to wear, it was very very distinct and it’s an older perfume that people don’t really wear nowadays. I think it’s called… Air by Clinique. I’ve had that smell surround me and I’d stop and the first time it happened I was looking around and said “Grandma?” It was like she was right there.

    Another thing that happens is when I’m having a really bad time either dealing with my PTSD or was majorly struggling financially, I’ll hear a piano. She used to play for her church and played for me quite often growing up. I came across a song she played, from the 1930s if I’m not mistaken, called “Glad Rag Doll”. It made me cry. But it’s been really great to have her help to pull me out of a dark time by letting me know that I’m not alone. Whether its by hearing her songs, smelling her perfume, or feeling a touch on the shoulder- it’s helping to keep me alive.

  43. mike said on August 25, 2013 at 6:42 pm ... #

    Very happy to know that odd things happen after a loved one passes to others. My mother was in Hospice after fighting cancer. My older brother kept telling her to give us a sign when she gets to Heaven. When she finally lost the fight, the lamp that was on a table next to her bed dimmed for about five or six seconds.Later that morning. 3:30 a.m., we ( my dad and 3 brothers) were standing outside of my parents home, talking about my mom. As we were talking, the street light dimmed just like the lamp had earlier. (Now this is the REAL occurance that makes me BELIEVE!) My oldest brother, myself, and our dad had decided to take a fishing trip to kind of clear our minds about the passing of my mom a week earlier. We had went out on my dads small three person boat in the river in our town. (salt water) We drove around for about an hour or so, stopping a few times to try our luck. I had a bucket of bait fish close to where I was sitting, so I was the “bait catcher “. On our last stop of the day, we casted our lines out. My dad lost his bait so I attempted to catch another live baitfish from the bucket. With no luck even on the third or fourth try. As I was still trying, my brother had gotten hung up on a rock at the bottom of the river. As he tried to free himself, our dad had said “Mike, what we need is one of those little nets that people have for their fishtanks.” At that moment my brothers line had became freed and he pulls up a wood handled net!! It was in good shape too. We all looked at eachother in complete disbelief. Then at the same time, we started to laugh and cry at the same time. My dad said “Well boys, looks like your mama is still looking out for you.” My brother and I said “Thank you mom.” My dad then said, “Sharon, I sure could use another cast net.” That was a great ending to a so -so fishing trip.!!!!!!! Thanks to everyone who has had similar stories to share!!! Always believe! You are not alone on your experiences. : – )

  44. ann said on August 29, 2013 at 11:33 pm ... #

    loved the stories. My mom unexpectedly passed away last year. My younger brother was in the middle of nowhere the wildernest and was crying his heart out when a white bird showed up, sat on a post, stared at him and wouldn’t leave. They do no get white birds in that part of the country. The next day I found a long white feather laying perfectly infront of my car. To me this was a sign from above. It was mom letting us know she was there for us and ok.

  45. dori said on September 6, 2013 at 11:05 am ... #

    Our daughter went missing from 2008 never found. We didnt know what happened last to see her was fiance who killed himself. It was midnight new day my birthda. my husband turned the nite light off he got into bed 5 seconds later the nite lite was on illuminated the whole room in a light blue color. We looked at each other our little daughter says mom Becky has come to say happy birthday to you we had confirmation she was no longer on earth but crossed over mother daughter bond cant be broken I was not the same after experiencing this she had a humorous side still exists in spirit woeld

  46. Denise Galownia said on September 19, 2013 at 1:52 pm ... #

    My father pasted recently and he had a very deep love and sense of protection towards my grandson. It was very strange because the morning he passed my Grandson was at school and when he came home the first thing he said was, “What happened to PaPa, I could not stop thinking of him all day and I wanted to cry.” (he isonly 6). Recently random hearts are appearing around him. One cay he poured his cereal and when he poured the milk over it made a perfect heart shape. This morning when he and his mother went to the car to drop him off at the bus stop, the front window was fogged, but a perfect little heart was in the center. You could tell it was not drawn in. He feels his PaPa is telling him he loves him. I cannot find anywhere if a heart is symbolic of a message from a loved one.

  47. Camie said on October 4, 2013 at 11:54 pm ... #

    A very very close friend and coworker of mine committed suicide November of 2012. When at work today someone found his picture just laying on the ground after being gone for almost a year now. We hung the picture up and while I was sitting here looking at it the song I miss you by Miranda Lambert started to play on the radio and that is the song that I said after the funeral that would always remind me of him. What is he trying to tell me?

  48. chuck wagstaff said on February 11, 2014 at 3:03 am ... #

    On the 12 of november my mother died at hands of people that could use their authority to muniplate the matter to the point that I could not do anything obout it,
    She died a horrible death she knewe she said to me ( help thair trying to kill me get me out of here ) that was the first day i knew it to being her care giver for
    so many years.
    I cant let this happen to any more people it has to stop the old people in this country is what made it great,my mother never huirt enyone she helped everyone she could we must stop the way they are dieing to stop tereatmants and let there medical conditon go it took two weaks
    to kill her it was horrible death to watch she was denied oxygen hart pills water pills she had to take blood thinners, what was bad she know what was going on
    she said to me the first day thar( trying to kill me.) when i ask them about it thay said i have no say so at what thay do to her i tried to get some one to help but i got put in jail the next time i saw her she was bad
    they was not giving water so her kindneys would go out the adema in her legs was so bad her hands looked baseball gloves i took them her compression boots but they would use them
    how could poeple be so cruel they wont let a dog die like that but its ok for grandmom when blood clot went to her head her right eye went gray thay moved her on the 10
    medical center of mckinney the people at country side told me thay moved her so i could not see her on the 11 my doctor called me and said if i wonted to see her alive
    I need to get to the hospital he let me in the back way so the guard would’t see me, she looked so bad i knew it was all most over for her the guard came in with the nurse i
    asked if they was going to help her they said the judge told them not to how can this man do that to my mother when i tried to leave the guard ran in to me with his big belley tried to knook
    me dowm why would he do that to me i just wanted to see my mother he followed me to my car saying come on come on trying to get to fight him then when i left they the cops got after me they said that
    he tolded them that i tryed to run him over i did not.
    I had to go to a court the 12 the hospice commited perjury they said that they took her from abusive situation for her saftey yet it took to weaks for them to kill her she was in living hell they would not let me see her she wonted to diy at home and not around poeple she did not know how could these people not let my mother have her last wish
    we must stop them from doing it to eney more people pleses help me my phone 2148510024 thay must be held accountable for this dont let it happen to your mother or dad
    I well not stop till it chanes i can not stop i couldnt keep my mother alive no matter what i did but maybe i can keep some one elses mother alive
    we oh it to them to die with dignity and respect its the least we could do

  49. Kenzie Elliston said on March 18, 2014 at 10:53 am ... #

    My great grnadmother passed about three or so years ago, she passed at age 92. My Aunt Ellen passed two years ago Febuary 21st. Amma’s death was of old age.. but lord she was an amazing lady. Ellen on the other hand, she was killed in a car crash.. i took her death pretty hard, one because she lived in Canada, as well as alot of my family, my family and i live in the U.S so we only got to see that family about once or twice a year. My mom, and i always say that we know in our hearts that they are our guardian angels. Im a competion cheerleader and my mom tells me that everytime i take the floor to perform that she prays to amma and ellen, for me to be okay, an do my best, and for them to guild me safely through the routine in their arms. She also does the same with my brother, my brother plays college baseball for Point University, hes also a freshman, he is also one of their starting pitchers. And let me tell you my brother is AMAZING. About two weeks ago my brother had a home game, and my mom AND my dad both prayed to god, amma, and ellen that he would pitch to the best of his ability. well after the game was over and drew go home, he was telling Mamma and Daddy that when he was about throw the first pitch, he lookd own and there was a ladybug on his pants.. keep in mind it was like 30 degrees outside and he said that ladybug held on for dear life because when he got back in the dugout, it was still there. So now it makes my belief in gaurdian angels even stronger, i know in my heart that was Ellen or Amma because they are watching over each and every one of us.

  50. Julie Bakerville said on June 12, 2014 at 12:55 pm ... #

    We have had a special little bird that has been pecking at our windows just a few weeks before our aunt passed on and is still doing the same things. The bird follows me even at the bathroom window sitting on the bamboo tree, peeking in and singing. Quite the rambuncious little bird! I think our aunt Maryanne is telling us she is with God and out of pain. Maryanne had/has a beautiful voice. Now she sings in the fullest light where we only for us now we have but a glimpse. Our loved ones that have left, now live in their “new bodies” in that beautiful place we call heaven…

  51. jen said on July 23, 2014 at 11:19 pm ... #

    My best friend passed away 9 months ago. She use to call me lovebug. Ever since she passed, i have been seeing ladybugs everywhere. Not just live ones but stuffedanimals, toys, pictures, everything. A ladybug was inside the car once right after we just got done going ghost hunting. My son and i were sitting on the couch and a ladybug was crawling on his laptop and remained there for hours.what really amazes me is, my best friend and i had an inside joke about bees. I see combinations of ladybugs and bees beside each other all the time. Even on vacation,in a claw machine a bee and ladybug were side by side looking outward. I just smile and now she is with me.

  52. rhonda said on August 16, 2014 at 8:41 pm ... #

    I have had a red cardinal peck at my windows for the last three months.When i respond to him he breaks out in song,i told my husband that is so odd he sings at my back door til i greet him,two days ago my mother passed away i knew she was older but i was not prepared.Over the yrs we have given each other gifts Bird gifts.her sister who passed away before her said When you see a meadowlark think of me.I am wondering if this bird is one of my loved ones who came to comfort me in time of need.thank you

  53. Kimberly said on October 26, 2014 at 11:04 pm ... #

    For my best friend and I our fathers have always visited us as double rainbows. My dad passed away 2 years ago and that entire weekend that he was admitted to hospice and “dying” I saw double rainbow after double rainbow, tons in 1 weekend! Then after he died on Sunday September 23rd at 8:07 am a double rsinbow appeared again. This July On my wedding eve it stormed on our boat cruise and as we pulled into the harbor the clouds cleared and 2 gorgeous bright rainbows and sun appeared. He wanted me to know he was with us. Pretty amazing and it happens all the time, even when the weather is cloudy and raining they’ll appear. Miss my daddy but it’s these signs that make me cry happy tears

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  55. Michelle said on October 30, 2014 at 4:00 pm ... #

    It’s interesting to read your experience with the deer and I feel like I have experienced many signs in the last month. My husband unexpectedly passed on 9/27 but the next day and several days since a buck has appeared in the back yard of our house. The first night I was out on the deck where my husband enjoyed many hours watching the wild life that lives on our property and the buck appeared out of no where and just starred at me for an unusually long time so I waved. He’s been back other times when friends visit and when I’ve had work done of the house. I hadn’t seen the reference to the Native American symbol but thanks for posting as it’s so true to who he was. We also have a crow that makes lots of noise when I’m doing things that he might not agree with how I am doing them. He used to mock the crow so I find it funny when I hear the crow “complaining”. And, finally we recently had a red fox hanging around which makes me think about the one we saw in the Grand Tetons a couple of months ago. I take great comfort in all of these signs.

  56. Bridget said on November 19, 2014 at 3:42 pm ... #

    When my mum was being lowered into the grave, there was a deer standing watching on.

  57. Diana said on November 26, 2014 at 8:14 pm ... #

    My aunties neighbour recently passed, and whilst I was viewing her property I saw 5 identical butterflies in her bedroom. Is this a sign ?

  58. sylvie said on December 13, 2014 at 11:47 am ... #

    Thanks for sharing. The day my mom passed away there was a drape of crow that flew close to her windoe. We knew it was time. I had a conversation with her while she was in a coma and told her i would look for rainbow and would know she is around. The first year i saw in different ways rainbows and i could feel her. I even had one during a very cold winter day the rainbow was clear i knew this was for me. I miss her daily but whenever i get some type of sign it sure makes my day.

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