Getting “Closer” … When You Thought it was Already “Closed”

Write a letterI’ve lost several people in my life. One in particular comes to mind in writing this. I lost him when I was a sophomore in high school; I can recall the weekend he passed away and when I decided to play a soccer game on Saturday morning instead of joining my family for the wake and funeral preparation.

Not because I didn’t care or didn’t want to acknowledge it, but because it is what I thought he would have wanted … he was always proud of what I did and what I played so that day I played for him. In addition to the weekend he left us I can recall the last time I saw him …

I didn’t realize that I was regretful and holding resentment against myself until one particular Comfort Zone Camp in August  that I wrote him a letter, as we were all given the opportunity to in our Healing Circle, and tears began to flow.

I wrote him a letter apologizing for the times that I didn’t spend with him, for all of the missed memories, and times that I can not get back. As I began to write out all the wrongs and all the “wish I hads” he began to respond with all the “thank you fors,” all the memories we did have, and how nothing was my fault.

I should no longer blame myself for the situation, but rather embrace what we had and continue to live, TO LIVE, in his honor, in the honor of everyone else that I no longer had. And so came “closer” to a situation I thought was already healed until I actually gave it some thought.

I challenge you to write to your loved ones. You may come out with lighter heart by letting go of something you didn’t know you were holding on to.

Our thanks to Nicole for sharing this article with us!

Image courtesy of Simon Howden /

One Comment:

  1. Ellie said on December 6, 2013 at 9:22 pm ... #

    I am very glad I found this on Pintrest. I am going to write to my son tonight. he died 8 months ago.

    Thank You

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